Whole Foods

How to pick up girls at Whole Foods

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  Whole Foods is an amazing place to find hormone-free chicken and hormone fueled men.

Whole Foods

The Most Addictive Legal Drug is Something You Wouldn’t Expect

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I have to come clean about an addiction that has overtaken my life.

whole foods shoppers

Science proves Whole Foods shoppers are terrible people

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A study has shown that people who buy organic food are self-righteous pricks.

Whole Foods

Finally, a Rap Song About Whole Foods

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As a rule of thumb, I try to avoid Whole Foods like I avoid gonorrhea; I've never understood why people feel the need to pay a premium for Kale salad and smug.


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