Tag Archives: Soccer

High Schooler Pulls Off the Most Impressive Soccer Throw-In You’ll Ever See

Except that, well, you'll see.

Rob Ford DESTROYS a Youth Soccer Goalie, Because Rob Ford Is a Glorious Dick

"You think you're tough, kid? You don't have shit on this in the box. GET ON MY LEVEL." - Rob Ford.

Patrice Evra Scored a Goal and Gus Johnson Was Excited

Rocket.

ESPN’s New 2014 World Cup Ad Is American as FUCK

Oh hell yes.

Israeli Soccer Team Displays Awesome Walter White Banner

Heart-stopping.

A Disguised Takeru Kobayashi Destroyed the New York Cosmos in an Eating Contest

Yum.

The U.S. World Cup Away Kit Bleeds America

#USA.

Ukrainian Soccer Player Saves His Opponent’s Life with Quick Thinking

A good way to tell that something unbelievable has happened in sports is if you watch three minutes of a Ukrainian soccer match.

Soccer Goalie Takes It To the Face In Most Agonizing Goal Ever

Ouch, ouch, ouch... Poor Bro.

Steven Gerrard Scored a Free Kick Goal That Will Make You Reconsider the True Nature of Mankind

Curvy.

Hulk Scored a Goal That Will Make You Rip Your Shirt Off Your Rippling Torso

Hulk smash.

What do Mario Balotelli, His Brother, and a Playboy Model Have In Common? A Sex Scandal!

This might go down as the most unlikely sex scandal of 2014... Stay classy, Europe...

Israeli Soccer Player Scores Goal, Celebrates With a Selfie

Say cheesy.

Clint Dempsey Delivered a Solid Nut Shot, Got Away With It

Doink.

Russian Politicians Ask FIFA to Kick U.S. Out of World Cup But We Will Not Go Quietly Into the Night

Last week American senators asked FIFA to ban Russia from the upcoming Rio World Cup.

Young Ecuadoran Soccer Star Takes on Entire Country of Paraguay, Scores Impressive Goal

A man. A plan. Ecuador.

This Soccer Leg Injury Video Makes Joe Theismann’s Leg Injury Look like All He Needed Was a Band-Aid

Not for the weak-stomached. Not at all.

These World Cup Jersey Redesigns Are Sick

Today marks just 100 days until the 2014 World Cup gets underway in Brazil, with the host country taking on [...]

Mesmerizing GIF Shows Every Ball Used in World Cup Since 1930

Look how shitty soccer balls were back in the day!

Here Are the United States World Cup Jerseys

Business casual.

Lionel Messi Scored a Goal That Left Students Unknowledgeable about Geometry Scrambling to Learn About Parabolas

I apologize that Kyle Koster isn’t working today. His soccer goal headlines are works of art. I tried here. Probably [...]

High School Soccer Player Boots 70-Yard Goal Two Seconds Into the Game

Quick strike.

Cristiano Ronaldo Scored a Goal That the Uptight People from the “Footloose” Town Would Hate

Watch his feet.

Rogelio Chavez Scored a Goal That Will Make You Pull Over to the Side of the Road and Compose Yourself Before Continuing

From way downtown.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic Scored a Goal That Will Make You Count Your Fingers and Toes to Make Sure They’re All There

Zlatan Ibrahimovic has a long history of shocking goals. He continued that proud legacy this afternoon in Paris Saint-Germain’s Champions [...]

Dog of the Year Invades Soccer Game, Takes a Dump

It was a banner weekend for animals invading the soccer pitch. First we had a rogue rooster going full Benny [...]

Rogue Rooster Creates a Real Scene at Israeli Soccer Match

Rooster on the pitch! Rooster on the pitch! If for some unknown reason you weren’t able to catch the Bnei [...]

Italian Soccer Player Celebrates Goal By Headbutting Glass, Gets Red Card

After scoring the world’s easiest goal, this Italian striker eschewed the congratulations of teammates and made a beeline for a [...]

Watch a Bunch of ‘Diehard’ Soccer Fans Claim to Know Players Who Don’t Exist

As Jimmy Kimmel has ably shown, if you stick a microphone in someone's face there's a good chance he will begin lying. At just

Lionel Messi Scored a Goal That Will Make You Wonder If He’s a Human Being

Lionel Messi is playing soccer again. And he's still ridiculously good at it. 

Alessandro Florenzi’s Bicycle-Kick Goal Will Make You File Your Taxes Early This Year

Alessandro Florenzi's name is full of vowels and his game is full of flair. His ridiculous bicycle-kick goal for AS Roma dropped jaws across the

Dog Plays Deer in Soccer, Everyone Wins

If that headline doesn't pique your curiosity, nothing will. Both of these animals should be commended for not taking a dive and being colorblind. The

Japanese Soccer Player Nails Sick Trick Shot During a Wedding Reception

Shunsuke Nakamura was tasked with hitting the ultimate trick shot at a (possibly real) wedding in Japan. 

Luis Suarez Scored a Goal That Will Make You Spit Out Liquid Dramatically

Luis Suarez is not a bad soccer player. He showed exactly how much he doesn't suck yesterday with this spectacular free-kick goal against Hull City

Wayne Rooney Scored a Goal That Will Cure Any Hangover

Wayne Rooney's 150th career English Premier League goal was spectacular and important. It helped Manchester United overcome a two-goal deficit to Hull City in a

Ronaldinho Must Be Joking With This Free-Kick Goal

Ronaldinho was once the biggest soccer player on the planet. That was several pounds and a weird webcam masturbation session ago.

This Soccer Goal Will Change Everything You Think You Know About Physics

Malaga's Eliseu didn't bend it like Beckham. He bent it like Kreskin. 

Mario Balotelli’s Shoes Were Pretty Newsworthy

Mario Balotelli is not one to deflect any attention. The AC Milan star continued his proud tradition of doing whatever the hell he pleases yesterday

Intel Purchases Ad Space on Inside of FC Barcelona Jerseys, Darren Rovell Ejaculates

Probably. I have no proof that upon hearing this news, Darren Rovell ran into an adjacent office closet and began furiously cranking on his man member

Soccer Ref Gets Punched in the Nose

Soccer players have been known to embellish everything, so it was only a matter of time until something like this happened.