dumb crime

Watch This Drunk Guy Drive Head-On Into A Parked Cop Car And Be Happy You’re (Hopefully) Not This Stupid

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Are you so dumb that you’d not only drive drunk, but also plow head-first into a parked cop car while drunk.

dumb crime

Can You Guess The Crappy Reason This Guy Forcibly Held In His Poop For 3 Weeks?

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When you gotta go ya gotta go, unless going means that you’ll immediately get charged by police while in their custody because the dump you took consisted entirely of little bundles of cocaine.

sororities

N. Arizona University Sorority Girl Breaks Into A House, Strips, Assaults Police And Has LOTS Of Drugs In Her Pockets

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Before I begin I would like to say that the source this story originated from, the Arizona Daily Sun, did not identify Makena Marie Haydon, 20, as a student at Northern Arizona University.

dumb crime

Crappiest Boyfriend Ever Calls Cops On Girlfriend About $6,000 Worth Of Weed In Her House After They Fight

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Look, there are some lines you just don’t cross when fighting with your girlfriend.

dumb crime

If You Can Guess Why These Kids Were Breaking Into Houses And Stealing Gold I’ll Give You $1*

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Now I know that title sounds stupid, because it’s not like you really need a reason to burglarize homes for gold other than “I like money and free things and breaking into places through windows.

Jerking off

Busiest Man In The World Is This Train Passenger Who Jerked Off Onto More Than 100 Women In 4 Years

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Why get a girlfriend when you can just cut a hole in your jacket and jerk off onto unsuspecting women while riding a train.

dumb crime

Underage Louisiana College Students Busted For Trying To Take 1800 Cans Of Beer To The Beach

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Kids, I know you all think you’re drinking champions and that whatever party you’re planning on throwing over spring break is gonna be a rager, but – and I’m (not) sorry to crush your dreams here – all 4 of you are fucking idiots.

dumb crime

The Ballsiest Chick In The World Kicked A Cop In The Dick And Then Offered Him A Blowjob To Say ‘Sorry’

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I’ve cut back on my drinking lately because I’m the epitome of a drunk white girl.

dumb crime

Watch This Reporter Get Mugged Live On Camera By The Dumbest Criminals Alive

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I dunno about you guys, but if I’m going to try to mug a news reporter I’d probably wait until the camera wasn’t rolling.

dumb crime

Check Out This Idiotic Murder Contract Written By A 14-Year-Old To Get His Classmate To Kill His Family

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When I’m looking to have my entire family senselessly murdered and staged as a burglary gone wrong the first place I turn to is Craigslist.

dumb crime

Drunk Underage Kid Accidentally Breaks Into The House Of A Mayor Trying To Crack Down On Underage Drinking

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There's nothing wrong with getting into a little drunken debauchery while you're in college, but at some point you need to draw a line between what's acceptable and what's going to get you arrested.

dumb crime

This Guy Kidnapped Himself So He Could Extort $450 From His Wife Because He Was Mad She Earned More Money Than Him

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In my ideal world I’m hitched by the time I’m 27 and my husband makes enough money that I can sit around at home playing video games and spend my days dicking around doing whatever.

dumb crime

Watch This Half Naked Guy On Drugs Jump Off A Bridge, SPLAT Onto Pavement, Then Get Up And Stroll Off To The Sunset

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If you ever need an argument on why drugs aren't "that bad" for you and how the war on drugs is a complete waste of money, look no further than this half naked guy cracked out of his mind in Mexico.


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