Sports
by Mr. T on October 7, 2011

You Know Who You Should Start?

Eli Manning (QB – N.Y. Giants)
Eli Manning had a hectic offseason. All the attention was focused around his brother Peyton, which wasn't abnormal since he's the family breadwinner. But this was different. Peyton's neck injury wasn't just causing big brother the problems. Suddenly Eli was being thrust more into the spotlight. Dad Archie was selfishly trying to keep the Manning name in the spotlight and was pushing all of Peyton's sponsors to accept Eli instead for the time being. The media pressure was also intensifying with Eli being the new active leader in consecutive starts and the only Manning lining up behind center. It all became too much to handle.
 

Eli struggled during training camp and preseason under the pressure. It was possibly the worst he looked since his rookie season and people were starting to wonder. His mental instability showed even in his commercial appearances as he was clearly unable to throw an accurate ball to the Toyota salesman. After Peyton had his surgery, he called up Eli to calm him down. “Look man, no one expects you to be as good as me” Peyton said. “I’m the greatest QB in the history of the NFL. Just watch how the Colts will struggle with me on the sidelines this year. You’ve got plenty of teammates that make you look a lot better than you actually are. Just rely on then.”
 

Manning took the advice to heart and got his shit together after Week 1. His last three games have been strong and he’s been getting his receivers the ball on a more accurate basis. As people look around the league and see how sloppy some QBs look, Eli’s stock just rises higher. It’ll get better this week as he takes on a Seahawks defense that’s given up over 250 yards to QBs in each the last three weeks. With lots of QBs on the bye this week, Eli looks like a pretty solid option.

You Know Who Else You Should Start?

Mark Ingram (RB – New Orleans)
So Ingram hasn’t exactly looked like the second coming of Emmitt Smith. He’s more or less resembled something the second coming of Lamar Smith. But Carolina’s run defense is weak and the Saints should put up plenty of points this week, which should lead to at least one touchdown with Ingram still dominating short yardage situations.


Jackie Battle (WR – Kansas City)
With six teams on the bye this week, you’re probably looking for some Hail Mary options at RB. Battle is gaining momentum in KC because Thomas Jones is f*cking old and Dexter McCluster is f*cking small. Look for Battle to get carries against a Colts’ squad missing three DTs.

Jacoby Jones (WR – Houston)
The Raiders couldn’t cover the bill for a sack of Chic-Fil-A sandwiches right now. Jones is stepping in for Andre Johnson over the next few weeks and he did very well in that situation at the end of last year.

Steve Breaston (WR – Kansas City)
Again we’re looking for a deeper pick with all the teams on the rag this week. Breaston racked up 91 yards last week and can put together some big plays with the coverage shifted to focus on Dwayne Bowe.

Jermaine Gresham (TE – Cincinnati)
A safety blanket is a rookie QB’s best friend and Jacksonville is allowing the second most points to fantasy TEs. It’s a nice setup for Gresham this week.

You Know Who You Should Sit?
 

Reggie Wayne (WR – Indianapolis)
Eli Manning wasn’t the only person dealing with problems as Peyton Manning seemed destined to spend the season on the sidelines. Wayne was unable to secure himself a contract extension and will likely have to face free agency after the season. Wayne will turn 33 in November and he’s already shown signs of age. The replacements for Manning didn’t look too rosey. Right when the rumors started circulating of Kerry Collins signing with the Colts, Wayne almost lost his shit. He had seen how bad Collins was with the Titans last year and knew how complicated the team’s offense was. Curtis Painter was inexperienced, but at least he knew the offense. Wayne backed Painter thinking the kid would eventually get his shot and would look to the veteran as a safety blanket. Wayne needed stats to get paid in the offseason and that was his best idea on how to get it done.
 

With Manning out, Wayne knew he was destined for a shitty season. He just didn’t know it would be this f*cking terrible. After Week 1’s garbage time stat acc*mulation, Wayne has only managed 11 catches in the last three games. The yards aren’t there, the touchdowns aren’t there, and the dollar signs over Wayne’s head aren’t there either. Last week Painter found Pierre Garcon on short screens for TDs because those were the only throws Painter was able to complete and Garcon just made him look good. With things this bad, Wayne has dropped so far that he’s no longer an automatic start and you might be able to find better options this week.
 

You Know Who Else You Should Sit?
 

Ben Roethlisberger (QB – Pittsburgh)
Big Ben needs his mobility to be effective and that’s not exactly possible with a bum foot. The Titans defense is also playing surprisingly well.

LaGarette Blount (RB – Tampa Bay)
On paper this might look like a good match-up, but the 49ers are actually allowing the least amount of fantasy points to RBs so far this year.
 

Marshawn Lynch (RB – Seattle)
The Giants’ run defense has struggled so far, so it will be a point of emphasis this week. They’ll also put together a big lead, which will force Seattle to throw and that keeps Beast Mode off the field.
 

Mike Thomas (WR – Jacksonville)
Once again the Bengals’ defense will show they’re surprisingly one of the better units in the league.

Owen Daniels (WR – Houston)
The Raiders can’t cover WRs, but their linebackers and safeties have been doing a pretty good job with TEs this year. They shut down the unstoppable Rob Grownkowski last week, didn’t they?

Mr. T

About Mr. T...

Mr. T came out of the womb with a TV remote in one hand and a piece of paper with a bookie’s number in the other. Anointed a child prodigy after winning a March Madness pool at the age of nine, Mr. T serves as BroBible’s fantasy sports expert and resident handicapper. He's never seen a road trip he didn't like and spends way too much time researching female celebrities.

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