Rugby Player Casually Grabs Opponent’s Weiner During Game, Proving Athletes Will Do Anything To Get A Head

Brilliant. There’s no better way to gain a competitive advantage than grabbing a handful of your opponent’s Johnson. It’s unclear from the video whether or not Newcastle’s Korbin Sims was licking his lips while he gripped Willie Mason’s kielbasa, but I choose to believe he was, and any differing opinion falls of deaf ears. Mason reacted to his former teammate cupping his meat and potatoes and was very light-hearted about the incident. Like almost too light-hearted.

“Offended? Please. I think it’s hilarious.” I hope he doesn’t [get charged for the incident] because me and Korbin are really good mates and I think it was unlucky because of the timing of it all.”

“I knew what he was doing. I was talking to him as he was doing it. I didn’t even flinch. It was quite funny to me. He’s just a good young kid and I would hope that nothing is done because of it. It’s just two good teammates from the last three years having a good old … just having a good reacquaintance.”


Sims’ tactic wasn’t effective, as Newcastle lost the match 30-10 at the hands of Manly, so maybe I won’t try to make out with my opponent at my next men’s league basketball game.

[H/T The Guardian]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.