Sports Illustrated stuck Roger Goodell on the Iron Throne this week for its cover highlighting the 50 most powerful people in sports. If you're a Goodell fan—all three of you—it's undoubtedly a cool image. There's King Goodell, sitting on a kickass throne, presiding over one of the world's most powerful brands, The Shield. It's regal. It's intimidating.
However if you're a Goodell detractor, you're probably thinking one thing right now...
GAH JOFFREY YOU LITTLE SHITHEAD NO ONE LIKES YOU.
Yes, right now on millions of Sports Illustrated covers, Goodell sits on a throne currently occupied by the least likeable character on TV. A guy who has inspired more anger than any of the other evil men occuping Westeros. A guy perhaps best summed up by this Tyrion quote: "We've had vicious kings, and we've had idiot kings... but I don't know if we've ever been cursed with a vicious idiot for a king!"
How is Goodell like Joffrey? Well he's definitely got the vicious idiocy down—his decision to try to increase the regular season to 18 games, while simultaneously professing to care about players' safety, is a Joffrey move through and through. And his continued denial that the NFL causes its players to be brain damaged? That's showing same callous disregard for people's brains that Joffrey did while cutting off Ned's head.
In fact, speaking of Ned's head... Remember when Goodell acted, shall we say, rashly when he essentially canceled the Saints' 2012 season? Acting rashly is Joffrey's gig too! New Orleans is Goodell's Winterfell.
Goodell's popularity index is also similar to the leader of Kings Landing's. Joffrey is nearly universally disliked by his people. Only 39 percent of NFL players claim they approve of ole Roger (so he's got a few Cersei's of his own; good for him). And how many Peter King profiles have you read on Goodell's "crazy, NFL-player-esque workouts"? Echoes of Joffrey also playing Pretend Warrior.
This cover was spot-on. Well done, SI. You made a sneaky statement here.