The Redskins’ On-Field Failures Are Affecting One Guy’s Performance in Bed

They blow a game, you have a drink. Maybe you have another drink. You pout, you mope and then hopefully you move on. 

But what happens when that pattern persists for 20-some odd years? Holden and Danny, a Washington-based sports talk radio show, recently hosted a segment called “How have the Redskins ruined your life?”

The responses were as excellent as you would expect from long-time suffering football fans. 

The answers range from pinning high blood pressure on the faltering franchise, to one man being hated by his children because of the foul mood the losses put him in, and another admitting to yelling at his own kids more than is necessary.

One father even said his son refuses to bring his Redskins’ keychain to school any longer. Poor little guy.

But one guy had it MUCH tougher than the rest. 

“Now listen, I’m gonna tell y’all how they messed me up, man,” Dave said. “I put my heart and soul into these Redskins, man. The other day my girl wanted to have sex with me, I couldn’t even do it bruh. I’m just so hurt with these Redskins.”

“Hold on, you turned down sex because of the Redskins?” Holden asked.

“I think I’ve got ED or something man. I don’t know,” Dave said. “It’s because of these Redskins, man, I can’t do it.”

You gotta… at that point.. you gotta care less about football, bruh. 

[Via 106.7 The Fan]