Pro Golfer Nearly Chopped His Dick Off After Angrily Shattering His Club

Professional golfer Tom Lewis nearly self-castrated himself on Saturday.

Lewis (-10) is sitting T9 after three rounds and 5 back from leader Scott Hend in the European Tour’s Thailand Classic. However the good news for Tom is that he still has a dick after a bit of good luck.

Lewis, who was the European Tour’s Rookie of the Year in December 2011, was quite unhappy with his play. He was so upset that he slammed his club into the ground in frustration. The club snapped in half and the rocketed through his legs and was launched several feet behind him. The club came within inches of smashing him right in the twig and berries. He almost got shafted in his shaft by the shaft of the club. What I’m trying to say is that Lewis almost clubbed his wood with his wood club.

That would have made for a very unromantic Valentine’s Day as he’s icing down his nads because he threw a temper tantrum.

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[SBN]