Youth Football Player Scampers For A TD While Entire Defense Does The ‘Whip’ ‘Nae, Nae’ And What Have We Become?


I don’t know, man. I’m really, really trying not to be that bitter asshole who incessantly hates on the younger generation and is convinced that his way is better. After all, I am a 28-year-old blogger without a comma in my bank account and a girlfriend to spend the holidays with. And I know how ridiculous my grandfather sounded when he gave me the whole “I had to walk 3 miles uphill” schtick. Is it just me or did all of our grandfathers live at the bottom of a hill??

But fuck man.

Doing a fucking choreographed dance in the middle of a football game? In AMERICA??? On PLANET EARTH?? I’m not saying this just to say it, I’m saying it because it’s probably true: my dad would have whip, nae nae-d my ass if I even attempted these shenanigans on the football field. At the very least, not looked me in the eye the entire dinner, if I was granted dinner to begin with. In my day, dads would fight in parking lots, players would POUR their souls into every play, knees would be bloodied. But now. Now. The world is burning. Have we colonized Mars yet?

Now excuse me as I take a shit on my neighbors lawn.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.