Sports
by Reggie Noble on October 15, 2012

One drink for each


  • First down

  • Punt

  • Replay

  • Commercial break

  • Promotion for upcoming ESPN program

  • Flashback to last Monday

  • Any mention of Peyton Manning – congrats, you’re going to die
  • Gratuitous John Elway shot
  • Time Philip Rivers looks pissed
  • Norv Turner looks exasperated
  • Antonio Gates reception

Two drinks for each


  • Turnover
  • Mention of Willis McGahee’s fumbling issues
  • Reminder of Demaryius Thomas’ game-winning reception in last year’s playoffs
  • Bad call (hey, the normal guys aren’t perfect either)

  • Time Eric Decker is compared to another white wide receiver
  • Flashback to Manning’s time in Indianapolis

Three drinks for each


  • Challenge

  • Touchdown

  • Field goal

  • Overhead shot of San Diego
  • Time you remember a hilarious line from “Anchorman”
  • Time the Chargers postseason ineptitude is discussed
  • Play over 20 yards
  • Anyone on your Facebook feed details the game’s fantasy football implications

  • Time Jon Gruden refers to someone as “this guy”

Finish your drink if


  • Manning rushes for a score
  • Ryan Mathews falls victim to the dreaded goal-line touchdown poach
  • Either quarterback throws for over 300 yards
  • Any team opens up a 14-point lead

Expert's pick: Denver 24, San Diego 20

Pass-Out Percentage: 62 percent