Holy hell, does tonight’s game ever suck! Two terrible teams, the Philadelphia Eagles and Carolina Panthers, will try to avoid further embarrassment on national television. The only thing to make it watchable, of course, is this drinking game. Please drink with us.

One drink for each
:

• First down

• Punt

• Replay

• Commercial break

• Promotion for upcoming ESPN program

• Flashback to last Monday

• Mention of the injured Michael Vick
• Time Andy Reid looks flummoxed
• Time Nick Foles looks overmatched
• Time Cam Newton’s amazing rookie year is referenced
• Panthers rush of more than five yards
• Mention of the Eagles’ coaching jumble

Two drinks for each
:

• Turnover
• Steve Smith reception
• Foles completion
• Bad call
• Time Greg Olsen’s personal life is outlined
• Time you hear the name Juan Castillo
• Overhead shot of the stadium
• Mention of Reid’s late son
• Time the playoff picture is discussed

Three drinks for each
:

• Challenge

• Touchdown

• Field goal

• Tackle for a loss – this one’s sneaky bad
• Time Newton’s place among current quarterbacks is dissected
• Play over 20 yards
• Anyone on your Facebook feed details the game’s fantasy football implications

• Time Jon Gruden refers to someone as “this guy”

Finish your drink if
:

• The Eagles take a lead
• Someone scores a special-teams touchdown
• Either quarterback throws for over 200 yards
• Any team opens up a 14-point lead

Expert's pick: Carolina 28, Philadelphia 22
Pass-Out Percentage: 76 percent