A Completely Sober Lil Wayne Recreating Famous Sports Play Calls Is Something You’ll Want To See


At this point, I think it’s safe to assume that Lil Wayne is always fucked up. His sentences are just one big word. He sounds like my grandfather did at 9 pm during family Christmas after hoarding a bottle of Absolute vodka for himself.

It would actually be awesome if the NBA let Wayne give the color commentary for a full game. The NFL games are too precious, but there are 82 NBA games and anything is better than hearing Reggie Miller drone on during a TNT broadcast. Granted the entire game would be one giant BEEEEEEP but it would be hilarious nonetheless. I’d bet the family farm that he couldn’t make it to halftime without talking about eating ass or shitting. Try to find one Wayne song where he neglects to mention either of those two things and I’ll buy you lunch.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.