Sports
by Reggie Noble on October 7, 2013

One drink for each:

  • Matt Ryan completion
  • Geno Smith pass attempt
  • Commercial break
  • Time you realize you hate one, or both of these teams
  • Time Jon Gruden says something positive
  • Time the announcers try to convince you Atlanta isn’t a terrible sports town
  • Penalty

Two drinks for each:

  • Piece of effusive praise for the Jets defense
  • Time the Jets defense actually warrants praise
  • Piece of effusive praise for Julio Jones
  • Replay of THE BUTT FUMBLE – God, ESPN loves the Buttfumble
  • Beer commercial
  • Reminder Rex Ryan has a big personality
  • Discussion about Smith’s potential
  • Field goal
  • Shot of Mark Sanchez
  • Awkward promo for another program

Three drinks for each:

  • Run of 20-plus yards
  • Pass play of 30-plus yards
  • Shot of a team owner
  • Touchdown
  • Turnover
  • Field goal
  • Time Ryan is called “Matty Ice.”
  • Roddy White reception

Four drinks for each:

  • One of Antonio Cromartie’s kids you can name
  • Reception by Tony Gonzalez, who is WAY older than you

Chug your beer for each:

  • Safety
  • Time one team opens up a 10-point lead
  • Onside kick
  • Even remotely negative thing Gruden says
  • Time Santonio Holmes is worth the money