Derek the Shitty UConn RA Responds!

Barstool Sports says they were just forwarded an email update from Derek, the UConn RA who tried to outlaw fun tonight. And guess what? He loves fun! And is a bit of a nerd, but we already knew that. Here’s the text.

From: Derek
Date: April 7, 2014 at 3:54:29 PM EDT
Subject:Just to clarify…
So someone took the email I sent Saturday to heart and decided to Tweet it, so I’d like to clarify:

-I was trying to come off on the strict side so our floor wouldn’t be vandalized. That has been a problem here in the past (and was a problem Saturday night again) and could end in us getting an extra fee. That’s really the only point I was trying to get across, the rest was sarcasm.

-The laundry comment is a joke from Seinfeld. Next time I’ll include a link so you know that I’m kidding. We cheer for clothes

-If you think I’m being condescending in an email, call me on it. That’s not how I view my position and I was just trying to keep your shenanigans outside (where you are less likely to get in trouble).

Please address me the way I address you when there is a problem (mostly passive aggressive emails), as I could have explained that 90% of what I said was sarcasm and 10% was a plea to not have to document any of you guys. Could you really imagine me saying “be as far away from me as possible” to any of you? If you can, let me know. We clearly have not had enough bonding time for you to get my sense of humor.

But now it’s on the internet, so thanks.
Derek (“arguably the worst RA in UConn history”)

Bravo Derek! Go UConn! Let’s rage.