The Cincinnati Bengals will appear on HBO's Hard Knocks again this year. Andy Dalton and A.J. Green seem likeable enough, but we just saw the inner workings of Cincinnati during a season a few years ago. Couldn't we get a look at the Redskins and RGIII's recovery? Or the Seahawks and their offseason rise? Or the dream, the ultimate, the perfect scenario—Tebow and Gronk, minicamp roommates? This is why:
2001, Baltimore Ravens: Team goes 10-6. Loses in divisional playoffs. Fails to repeat Super Bowl-winning season.
2002, Dallas Cowboys: Starting Quincy Carter at quarterback, team goes 5-11. World is exposed to the depths of insanity present within Jerry Jones.
2007, Kansas City Chiefs: 4-12 season. Larry Johnson comes across as an ass during a lengthy holdout. (First impressions turn out to be true.) Paul Rudd narrates, which is a show highlight.
2008, Dallas Cowboys: No playoffs. 9-7 record. World further exposed to the modern-day Slim Pickins that is Jerry Jones.
2009, Cincinnati Bengals: A pretty good year in Cincinnati. 10-6 record. Marvin Lewis/Chad Johnson antics. An unfortunate upset loss in the Wild Card Playoffs.
2010, New York Jets: An AFC Championship appearance! Rex Ryan punting footballs! Rex Ryan cursing! "LET'S GO EAT A GODDAMN SNACK." Far and away the series' best season.
2012, Miami Dolphins: 7-9 record. Only beat one decent team all year.
2013, Cincinnati Bengals: ???
So there you have it. The (mostly) failure above is why we'll never be graced with the must-see TV that would be Tebow and Gronkowski-helmed Hard Knocks. No coach wants the distraction. They don't want a promising season go south, causing outsiders to blame the TV cameras. And the past recod doesn't look that great. Even if the show has nothing to do with a team's final record.