We've all been in fantasy football leagues with guys who take it way more seriously than others. You know the type: The person who never waivers because he doesn't know how, the guy who doesn't pay the dues, the apathetic son-of-a-bitch who starts players who are injured or on a bye-week, the lame-o who blows off the draft in favor of an auto-pick and ends up doing surprisingly well. All because they just don't give a sh*t. However, to others invested in the league, the lack of commitment from a fellow participant certainly be frustrating. That exact situation caused one fantasy football commissioner to blow a gasket and fire off this grumpy, curmudgeonly e-mail, obtained via With Leather:
I just want to start this letter off by saying that you are one of my best friends and I love you like a brother. We have known each other for a long time and have become very close over the years. Your heart is always in the right place but I feel the need to reach out to you in the hopes that you hear me out for real this time and decide that its time for a change.
There is a pattern of procrastination, immaturity, and an affirmative lack to be responsible. Everything that occurred last week in regard to the fantasy football draft, showed everyone in the league that knows you well and myself, that you have not grown up. I repeatedly sent emails out about the league throughout the course of the summer (to which i received no response from you). I repeatedly sent YOU specifically reminders about what you needed to get done in order to comply with the league rules, calendar dates, etc. But you continually would call me last minute to ask questions or just not do what you were supposed to.
I understand you are busy and in school; I was once there, but it is no excuse for your actions and inactions. The Sunday we had the draft, the following Tuesday and Wednesday I had <job withheld>. <job withheld> where I did everything myself. <job withheld> where I had to prepare and write up my <job withheld>. These were real <job withheld>, with real <job withheld>, real <job withheld>. I would have loved to move the draft back because of the things going on in MY life at the time, but I didn’t. I sucked it up; got my shit done, and was still able to participate in the draft TO WHICH MYSELF AND EVERYONE (INCLUDING YOU) AGREED TO AND KNEW ABOUT WELL IN ADVANCE. My point is that everyone in this league has their own personal lives and priorities but you had to miss the draft because you were out drinking.
As one of your best friends, I dont see how one, that is completely disrespectful to Mike and myself because of all the time and effort we put into this league; 2 disrespectful to the league as a whole; and 3 how irresponsible you are being. You didnt NEED to go and get drunk at that time. you knew in advance about when the draft was. I’m not telling you not to go out and have fun on a sunday, but you should have been responsible enough to leave, go to your house, be ready to draft at the time stated, just like everyone else.
It’s not a valid excuse, that some stupid girl was grinding on you, or you didnt time your day well enough to get back in time to draft. It doesnt matter that someone else drafted for you. this was your team, not someone elses, you were supposed to be ready for the draft, not someone else. Its a complete and utter disregard for the responsibilities to which you agreed to. I told you at the beginning of this season that if you didnt want to be a part of this league, if you didnt want to be active and participate, then you can get out and it would be no harm, no foul. I would rather you be in the league with everyone but not if your going to act like you have been for the past year. You told me you wanted to be in the league. So i gave you another shot.
It has been almost a week since the draft, since you blew us all off, and you have yet to call and apologize.
Your strikes are up. If you are not active and dont participate this year, if you f**k up in the least bit, I will not hesitate to kick you out of the league.
You need to shape up <name withheld>. Grow up. Be responsible. Be respectful. Because if you do not, then when it comes time for you to study for the <job withheld>, for you to go get a job in the real world, to become a <job withheld> and represent the profession, you will get hit hard with the realities that come along with it all.
TL;DNR: Fantasy football has never said so much about another man's character. Commitments, bro! If you have a great fantasy football e-mail that you think the world needs to read, do let us know.