Sports
by Lance Pauker on August 9, 2012

With about 200 meters left in his lap, Mitchell said he felt a pop in his left leg. He screamed loud enough for spectators to hear, but powered on—finishing in a slow-but-respectable 46.1 seconds, good enough for fifth. His relay teammates picked him up, finishing second and moving on to the final. A few hours later, doctors told Mitchell he had broken his left fibula.

In other words, the story goes something like this:

  1. Dude trains mad hard for Olympics, makes for 4×400 relay team 
  2. Dude runs in opening qualifying heat
  3. Dude breaks his leg while running in opening qualifying heat 
  4. Dude finishes despite breaking his leg during qualifying heat, because “(he) figured it's what almost any person would've done in that situation.”
  5. Internet goes ape sh*t
  6. Charlie Sheen's “winning” somehow becomes involved, to the chagrin of the 17% of people who take said comment totally seriously
  7. America
  8. The economy
  9. Ryan Lochte is dumb
  10. Conclude with somewhat relevant, undeniably hilarious, but ultimately forced pop-culture tie in***

***Reference courtesy of Deadspin commenting phenom, “Hit Bull Win Steak”

[H/T: Deadspin S/G Deadspin]