Sports
by Alex Nerney on July 22, 2013

Our Weekly Motivation:

Fantastic

Moving on…

Tired of weighing so little you float away in the wind? Sick of girls calling you “boney?” Done with your boys referring to you as “little guy” when you're mad.

Alright Skindiana Bones, follow the following:

1. You're probably not eating enough

The problem I generally see is that guys are not even close to eating enough. You stomach, like a vagina, is stretchable and becomes accustomed to what's placed in it. And if you're throwing a bratworst into a basement and expecting results, you're going to have a bad time.

Weight yourself daily.  If this number stays stagnant after a month of eating/training, the problem is obvious. If you are skinny, there should be no fear of overeating if you eat decently clean. Keep bumping the amount of food you eat until the scale is heading in the right direction. 

2. Too much time in the gym

The isn’t the fucking tour de france. If you're skinny and spending hours in the gym, you will stay skinny. You're calories are too precious to waste.

Spend no more than 45 minutes in the gym. Set an alarm and force yourself to leave. It will encourage you to be more focused and not spend 15 minutes coming up with clever intros (e.g. MY FAVORITE LIFT IS THE PILE DRIVER) -to say to the cute blond in the yoga pants.

3. Chipotle Bowls

Sure, a little less scientific than the others, but these things are awesome. Pounding a delicious 1,000 calorie bowl will surely help you put some mass on.

Remember, money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you double meat chipotle bowls, which is kind of the same thing.

4. Sleep More

I talk about this subject a lot and there's a reason for itt. Sleeping the right amount is the fitness equivalent to being able to dribble in the NBA.

Most importantly to this topic is that you build muscle when you sleep. Hormone formulation and tissue repair are happening when you lay your head on the pillow. Don't take it for granted.  

5. Focus on the Big 4

Bench, Overhead press, Dead-lift, and Squat. Mastering these four movements are the cinematic equivalent to Mr. Miyagi telling you to wax on and wax off, his balls (Don't reflect on how creepy it is for 60 year old man to take in a middleschool pupil and having him bend over and clean his car all day). 

Seriously though, these are heavy mass building exercises. Spend less time on the ancillary muscles and you will see more mass gains.

Pause for a moment and reflect with Jen Selter:

Jen's Instagram can be found: HERE

6. Protein = 1.15x body weight (at Least)

The debate on the amount of protein needed to gain muscle amongst fitness brofessionals is more heated than a blast furnace. I would hedge your bets and eat at least 1.15x your body weight in grams of protein.

The only harm can be in not getting enough. 

7. Fat = Testosterone = Muscle

Fat is essential to your production of testosterone, which is a massive component in muscle building. Saturated fat from meats and dairy are a good idea if you are really skinny.

Focus on eating more almonds, egg yolks, and fatty meats to help yourself out.

8. It takes time bro

You will probably not gain 15 pounds in a month bro. Unless you are on the juice, building pure mass is a slow and methodical process.

Enjoy the journey it will take to improve and don't get discouraged. In a world where literally everything is handed to us instantaniously, learn to relax. You will apprecaite your body only when you WORK for it.

See you next time, bros,
Alex Nerney – Certified Personal Trainer. Certified Nutrition Specialist, Lord of Broscience

For College Guys, Grab Alex's Ebook On College Fitness: HERE
Follow Him On Twitter For More Tips: HERE