The Cubs unveiled their new mascot yesterday, a bear named Clark the Cub. He’s creepy as hell and basically looks like a Tailspin character mid-orgasm. How’s that for a visual? Here’s everything you need to know about our furry little friend.
7. He doesn’t own a pair of pants
Twitter/Clark the Cub
6. He’s totally not coming for your children
Twitter/Clark the Cub
5. “He’s pretty funny on Twitter,” said the writers from 2 Broke Girls.
Still figryuing out how 2 tyype with these big pawz. Will gett lessons from @Cubs. Come back soon!!
— Clark the Cub (@ClarktheCub) January 13, 2014
Still figryuing out how 2 tyype with these big pawz. Will gett lessons from @Cubs. Come back soon!!
— Clark the Cub (@ClarktheCub) January 13, 2014
“”
4. He’s not as creepy as Pierre the Pelican
Twitter/New Orleans Hornets
3. Really, he’s not (via @nick_pants)
2. He already has a parody account
Twitter
1. The photoshop possibilities are endless
Courtesy of @Deadspin this is what happens when you drink too much at Wrigley. pic.twitter.com/75Yix9Qgdx
— Clark The Drunk Cub (@ClarkTheDrunk) January 14, 2014
“”