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7 sports ‘feats’ any average guy could do

By / 05.05.11

Lame Sports Feats

MCHart, Flickr



You’re here on one of the most popular men’s Web sites in the world. So at one time or another the majority of you wished that you were a pro athlete. You probably yelled “Jordan!” before launching a shot while playing pickup hoops as a kid. Or pretended to be Joe Carter or Kirby Puckett hitting World Series walkoff homers. Maybe you even pretended that if you sank that putt for a snowman on 18 that you won The Masters.

Guyism brings you good news! We’ve found seven sports feats that even you could accomplish. Remember, it’s never too late to dream. Except when the alarm goes off and you have to go to your crummy job. But even so, know that you could be just like these pro athletes.

Photo credit: MCHart, Flickr

7 Chris Bosh’s 1 for 18 shooting
I don’t care if your basketball experience is limited to pickup games. Or even Nerf Hoop or Pop-a-Shot. I’d bet that you too could match Chris Bosh’s horrid 1 for 18 shooting performance earlier this season against the Bulls. Even with the most basic knowledge of the game you could come off a screen and hit one of 18 jump shot attempts. Actually, you’d probably even nail 1 out of 18 halfcourt shots. Could you shoot .056% in an NBA game? You betcha.

6 John Daly’s 18 on the 6th at Bay Hill
You may already look like Daly and tend to indulge in some of his favorite things — past or present. The fan favorite also proved that he can hack just like a weekend duffer when he got to the 6th hole at Bay Hill in 1998. You may recall that’s when Daly hit six balls in the water on the par-5 hole and ended up with an 18. It was something straight out of Tin Cup (Obligatory Tin Cup reference). You could also card an 18 on that hole. Except that after your third shot hit the water I can only assume that your bag and clubs would be next in.

5 Duane Kuiper’s 1 Career Home Run
Duane Kuiper was a decent second baseman for the Indians and Giants, and he played in over 1,000 games during his 12 seasons. He had a lifetime average of .271, which is something you could not likely do. But what you could match is Kuiper’s 1 career home run in 3379 at-bats. You ever heard the old saying to “Swing hard because you might hit it”? If you had 3,379 major league at-bats, you’re going yard with at least one of them.

4 Chris Dudley’s Heinous Free Throw Shooting
Chris Dudley is arguably the worst free throw shooter of all-time. His 1989-90 season was particularly awful, and he has 2 feats that you could match. Playing for the Nets at the time, Dudley missed 17 of 18 free throws in a loss to the Pacers. He broke the NBA record in that game by missing 13 straight free throws. Not only could you do that, but you could also best Dudley’s .319 free-throw percentage from that season.

3 Mark James’ 111 at the Italian Open
Mark James has had an excellent golf career. He played on 7 Ryder Cup teams and has also captained the European team in 1999. You’ll never play in the Ryder Cup, except maybe in video games, but you could match one record James has: highest score ever recorded on tour. James got all shanky at a European Tour event back in 1978. He duffed and hacked his way to a score of 111 at the Italian Open in Sardinia. He should have put his change in his other pocket. (Obligatory Tin Cup reference…#2)

2 Hideo Nomo’s Horrible ERA
Hideo Nomo burst into stardom when he came to the Dodgers from Japanese baseball. But all those forkballs caught up to him and cashed out his arm. In 2004 Nomo started 18 games for the Dodgers and posted an ERA of 8.25 over 84 innings. They would have been better off using the batting practice pitcher in his place, or even you. Never let it be said that Nomo rested on his laurels. He came back in 2005 with the Rays and posted an ERA of 7.24.

1 Ryan Leaf’s Rookie Bustout
Manning or Leaf? Remember that question? Leaf had a rookie season to forget after being heralded as a can’t miss QB prospect. He started 11 games and completed just 45% of his passes. He also threw just 2 touchdown passes against 15 interceptions. The runner-up of the Punt, Pass & Kick competition could have done that, and you could have too.


TAGSArbitrary Rankingsbad sports featsChris BoshChris DudleyDuane KuiperfeaturedHideo NomoJohn DalyListsMark JamesRyan LeafSports
About Matt Lo Cascio... Matt Lo Cascio is a Chicago-based TV/web producer and writer that contributes to many different websites and blogs, including Chicago's MMA. His 20-foot jumper is money, even when they decide to guard him.

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