That's 50% more condoms than the 100,000 that were given out at the 2008 Beijing Games. It shakes out to 15 condoms for each competitor, a number that strikes me as pedestrian. These people are well-documented f*cking machines. Fifteen condos won't even put a dent in some people's sexual appetite -- better cozy up to Lolo Jones and hope she's not using hers to make balloon animals. But what I'm really hoping for -- from all of this safe sex -- is that everyone flushes their used scumbags when their done, because that will sure as sh*t put a crippling dent into the Olympic Village septic tank.

Other than that, I really have nothing else new to report except that the condoms have been provided by Durex and my boner has been provided by thoughts of raunchy sex with an Olympian.

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