Music
by Andy Moore on March 25, 2014

taylor-swift-freak-out-face

Taylor Swift made a career writing songs that appeal to teenage girls coming off their first breakup. This became a little weirder as Swift aged, her emotional maturity seemed to not age, and she broke up with more or less every straight guy in Hollywood: Taylor Lautner, Joe Jonas, Harry Styles, Conor Kennedy, John Mayer, Jake Gyllenhaal, Barack Obama, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, Mick Jagger, Pope Benedict XVI, the ghost of Kurt Cobain, Twiggy the Waterskiing Squirrel, and of course Jeff Goldblum.

But the chickens, as they say, have come to roost, and now no one wants to date ol’ Tay Tay. Via Radar:

“Taylor’s advisers are tired of setting her up on dates only to have her strange personality scare men away,” one source revealed.

“Taylor is almost impossible to find dates for because of the nature of her music, which focuses heavily on heartbreak and ex-boyfriends. None of the guys she shows interest in want to be the subject of a mean song six months down the road or be painted the bad guy, so Taylor’s team want her to take a break from boys.”

This is major, earth-shattering stuff. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” was written about Gyllenhaal. “I Knew You Were Trouble” was Mayer. And 90% of her other material was about some guy or another. (Maybe Twiggy the Waterskiing Squirrel.)

COULD THIS BE the end of Taylor Swift? What is an artist without his or her material? 

(She’ll be fine.)

Anyway, Radar says Swift’s business associates now wish she’d focus on bettering her female relationships. And maybe that will provide the songwriting inspiration she needs.

Now, those who advise Swift want her to take a break from love affairs altogether!

“They hope she will focus on building some strong female friendships and use that as an inspiration for the next phase of her career,” the source said.

The album about Selena Gomez is going to be fire. I wish I knew so much less about Taylor Swift.

[H/T: Radar]

Andy Moore

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