He talks about giving her "that really bomb sex." He had her "ass going north and south" but now she's choosen to go "west." He says she's moved on to "rappers and ballplayers," but we all know that she "belongs in his bed." This is Ray J singing about Kim Kardashian. It's extraordinary.
The song "I Hit It First"—from Ray J—leaked yesterday, and it can't be a coincidence that 25% of the song title shares its words with the greatest diss track of all time: Tupac's "Hit Em Up." Ray J leaves it all out here, letting Kanye West know that he was the first bro to nail Kardashian, and that he's got it on tape to boot. (You can tell that Ray J is a celebrity, because he actually believes that, since he is the first famous person to sleep with Kim, he is the first person ever to sleep with Kim.)
The chorus is really what makes this song. Ray J turns "I hit it first" into a schoolyard chant, like na-na-na-na. It's brutal in its taunting. I didn't think the VH1 reality star had it in him. Man.
And somewhere, Yeezy listens to this on a gold-plated MacBook, taking time to slowly dab away a tear with a Louis Vuitton handkerchief. He calls in his 45 producers. "My baby mama's honor is at stake. Give me the autotune."