Music
by Brandon Wenerd on February 10, 2013

Hey! Follow @BroBible on Twitter here

One Drink:

  • Every mention of the show's #theworldislistening slogan
  • Every time LL Cool J changes his hat
  • Every CBS camera shot of Justin Timberlake
  • PSY is pictured and everyone remembers how fucking sick he is of PSY
  • When CBS cameras show someone defying the strict dress code standards of the Grammys
  • Every time someone you're watching with makes an angry Chris Brown joke
  • If Carly Rae Jespen wins Song of the Year for “Call Me Maybe”
  • If Frank Ocean's “Channel Orange” deservedly wins Album of the Year
  • When Frank Ocean wins Best New Artist
  • When someone you're watching the show with complains about the Alabama Shakes getting robbed for not winning Best New Artist
  • If Lupe Fiasco looks strung out
  • Every time Jay-Z and Kanye West win for “Ni**as in Paris”
  • During a category that bores us to tears, like Best R&B Song and/or Performance
  • When “Levels” wins “Best Dance Song”
  • When Bruce Springsteen wins in any Rock category (just because he's The Boss)
  • Someone does a dance routine that could be a stripper show at the Spearmint Rhino

Two Drinks:

  • Every CBS camera shot of Drake. EVERY. TIME
  • Every time someone wearing a hipster douche outfit is shown. In otherwords, every time Skrillex is shown
  • When someone makes a joke about Taylor Swift's dating history
  • If Taylor Swift wins Best Record of the Year for “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”
  • If Gotye wins “Best Record of the Year” for “Somebody That I Used to Know”
  • If Fun. wins “Best Record of the Year” for “We Are Young”
  • Every time Beyonce looks smug
  • If Justin Timberlake's performance of “Suit and Tie” sucks, even with the addition of Jay-Z
  • If Odd Future shows up.
  • When Adele beats out Rihanna for “Best Pop Solo Performance”
  • Steve Aoki or Deadmau5 do something crazy in their acceptance speech after winning “Best Dance/Electronica Album”
  • Someone you're watching the show with makes snarky comments about Mumford and Sons dressing like American Civil War-era soldiers

Finish your drink:

  • When an artist looks visibly upset for not winning
  • If Rick Ross is eating a cheeseburger
  • Chris Brown and Frank Ocean get in a fight.
  • When someone makes a joke about Justin Bieber getting snubbed
  • If 2 Chainz has more than two chains on
  • If Nas manages to finally win a Grammy
  • If Skrillex beats Avicii for “Best Dance Song”
  • If there's an actual EDM artist beef war off-camera

Take a shot:

  • During the inevitable performance that makes everyone go “WTF?!” (ala Nicki Minaj's Satanic ritual last year)
  • If someone you're watching the show with asks, “Who was Levon Helm?” during the tribute to the late, great founding member of The Band
  • If someone you're watching the show with asks, “Who was Dave Brubeck?” during the Stanley Clarke, Chick Corea, and Kenny Garrett tribute to the late, great jazz pianist
  • If any artist other than Frank Ocean wins “Album of the Year”
  • If Drake's “The Motto” wins Best Rap Song of the Year
  • When you're sick of hearing “We Are Young,” “Somebody That I Used to Know,” and “Call Me Maybe,” just for the hell of it

Take a shot of whiskey:

  • Every country performance. Except you, Taylor Swift, because you're not country

Smoke a blunt

  • When CBS cameras show Snoop Dogg/Snoop Lion looking ridiculous
  • If someone — we're looking at you, Wiz Khalifa — actually references weed's legalization in Colorado and/or Washington

Butt chug*

  • Imma let you finish” — Kanye interrupts someone's acceptance speech for whatever reason. 

Have some more Grammy drinking game rules? Let us know in the comments! 

*Don't actually butt-chug, idiot.

Brandon Wenerd

About Brandon Wenerd...

Brandon Wenerd is BroBible's senior editor, guru of @brotips, and director of strategic partnerships. He joined BroBible in the fall of 2009 after graduating from Penn State. When he’s not writing, Brandon enjoys fishing, Phish, Philly sports, Dewey Beach, supporting live music, hot sauce, and beer. E-mail him with post ideas and news tips: brandon@brobible.com.

Post a Comment

Your email is kept private. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>