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7 do’s and don’ts for a successful booty call

By / 06.29.13
how to do a booty call

Zitona, <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/zitona/2098321266/sizes/z/in/photostream/" target="_blank">Flickr</a>


Booty calls, fun as they may be can be a pretty delicate arrangement. It’s an NSA (no strings attached) mutual agreement, but that’s just the goal and not always the reality. Since there are so many ways a simple booty call can go wrong, I’ve put together some tips to guide you on your path to what I like to call “freedom bangin’.” What are some rules you go by when it comes to a successful booty call?


Photo Credit: Zitona, Flickr

7 Don’t Call Too Early

jaqian, Flickr


The nighttime is the right time. Not the morning, not ever. Sure, you may stay over her place and have a roll in the hay the following day, but that’s just a continuation of the previous night.


Photo Credit: jaqian, Flickr

6 Don’t Call Too Late

robstephaustralia, Flickr


Just like Cinderella turning into a pumpkin at midnight (or you know, whatever magical Disney thing happened in that story), your booty call will eventually turn from a booty that you can call into a tired woman that passes out after a certain time, never to awaken…til’ the next morning. Make sure you call before that happens.


Photo Credit: robstephaustralia, Flickr

5 Do Provide the Sweet ‘O’

debs-eye, Flickr


A recent study from the American Sociological Review titled “Accounting for Women’s Orgasm and Sexual Enjoyment in College Hookups and Relationships” shows that most guys don’t care about a woman’s orgasm unless they’re in a relationship with her. That’s not cool, partly because reciprocation is what makes the world go round and partly because it’s a myth that ladies don’t care about having orgasmic shifts of their tit-tonic plates. Learn it, love it, do it.


Photo Credit: debs-eye, Flickr

4 Do Offer a Sleepover

Phil and Pam, Flickr


What kind of a guy would you be if you invited a girl over your place after midnight (when booty call traffic is at its peak) and then after doing the deed, crumpled into a sweaty, exhausted ball of satisfaction, falling asleep and forgetting to offer her the use of your shower or a spot in your bed to sleep? It would be like her not offering you a sandwich or a towel after you’re done.


Photo Credit: Phil and Pam, Flickr

3 Don’t Expect to Hang Out

Steve Snodgrass, Flickr


Make no mistake, the central theme here is to have fun (or, you know, provide some validation if that’s what you’re into, you sick bastard). You’re an outlet for primal urges, a stress-reliever and a good time, but not exactly a friend. Maybe you’ll “watch a movie” or see each other at a party, but this is not a lady who wants to spend the day with you.


Photo Credit: Steve Snodgrass, Flickr

2 Do Provide the Right Atmosphere

andreaarden, Flickr


No matter who she is, how you know her and what crazy shit she’s into, you should always provide a level of safety, cleanliness and comfort for her when she’s at your place and not overstay your welcome at hers. Yes, tact is important even in the context of a relationship that has the word “booty” in its title.


Photo Credit: andreaarden, Flickr

1 Don’t Take it for Granted

Foxtongue, Flickr


Just because you only see her for the sex, it doesn’t mean you should treat her with less respect. She’s still a person with a mind, even if you happen to focus all your attention on other parts of her body.


Photo Credit: Foxtongue, Flickr


(Previously published on September 24, 2012.)


TAGSArbitrary RankingsBooty Callbooty call advicebooty call guidebooty call rulesbooty call tipsfeaturedhow to make a booty callListsThe Library
Jason Epstein
About Jason Epstein... Jason Epstein is a nationally published freelance writer living in the greater NYC area. He's known for his close friends/good conversations/playing bass/wind in the face/rocking out/reading up/holding it down/good times/turning on dimes/and sometimes trying to rhyme(s). He can be reached at his website and you can follow him on Twitter here.

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