Not everyone enjoys the melodious sounds of pop/R&B/hip-hop (I honestly don’t know what he falls under, do you? No, I thought so) artist Ne-Yo, but I’d have to say the person who wins the award for “I Literally Hate Ne-Yo More Than Nickelback And That’s Saying Something” has to go to Zoe Fennessy.
Why does Zoe hate Ne-Yo so much? Is it because his songs are mostly all musy-gushy love songs? Is it because she hates Top 40 music as a general rule of thumb? Or maybe it’s because hearing his music makes her vomit uncontrollably while having a seizure.
If I had to guess, it’d probably be that last one.
Zoe Fennessy, 26, has an epileptic seizure within seconds of hearing the chart-topping singer Ne-Yo’s vocals.
The seizures make her freeze, vomit and unable to react to the world around her.
The healthcare assistant has to wear earphones whenever she goes shopping just in case the ‘Let’s Go’ singer’s tunes are played in stores.
She has been clinically diagnosed with ‘musicogenic seizures’ which are triggered by the tone of Ne-Yo’s voice.
So the next time you say “Golly gee ladybugs guys, I honestly fucking hate One Direction,” re-think your statement. Do you really hate One Direction? Like really? Does One Direction give you seizures and puke parties? Does the fear of hearing their music confine you to your home on a regular basis, or at the very least force you to wear headphones whenever you’re out in public in case one of their teeny-bopper songs come on? I don’t think so.
While Zoe apparently does not hate Ne-Yo or his music which makes her a better person than you or I, she recently underwent surgery to remove the portion of her brain that triggers her epileptic seizures. Surgeons reportedly removed part of her left frontal lobe in June, and luckily for Zoe JUST KIDDING IT DIDN’T WORK.
Plot twist, bitches.
But the surgery was not successful and doctors now fear she may have the condition forever.
Miss Fennessy – who has been unable to work for six months because of her affliction – said: ‘I don’t dislike Ne-Yo or his music, it just dislikes me unfortunately.
‘I’ll be walking around the supermarket doing my food shopping and I have to put my earphones in to listen to my own music just in case it comes on.
‘It’s the same with most shops. I have to walk in with my ear phones in at first just to make sure they don’t have Ne-Yo on.
‘If he ever releases a greatest hits album it’s going to be a nightmare.
‘Whenever I hear the first few beats of the song I have to drop whatever I am doing and run.‘People might think it is funny – and I can laugh at it myself – but it has taken over my life. It’s ruined my life…’
It wasn’t until she heard Ne-Yo’s first big hit, ‘Give Me Everything’ featuring Pitbull – which topped the charts in May 2011 – that she had her first music-induced seizure.
To be fair, anything with Pitbull in it has a 50% chance of giving anyone a seizure. 90% of his music consists of him screaming “MEESTAH WHURLLL-WYEEE” followed by “DALLAY,” and have you seen his dancing?
Dude looks like he’s got the squirts.
[H/T Daily Mail, header image via Shutterstock]