Wife Breaks Husband’s Dick When She Suddenly Stops Sex To Do Some Online Shopping

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Women be shopping. We all know women be shopping. And most of the time, it’s okay. Sure, it annoys us, but they usually don’t bring us along and while it’d be great if Loretta didn’t drain the bank account on some new shift dresses (whatever the fuck those are), at least she’s gone and we can drink a few beers and watch the game in quiet.

We deal with it.

But what happens when your woman be so shopping, she stops sex to online shop, and breaks your dick in the process.

Not so innocuous anymore.

According to Shanghaiist, a woman had her phone alarm set to go off when a massive Alibaba (think Chinese Amazon) sale started.

She was boning her husband at the time, but immediately jumped off to get on her computer and shop, shop, shop.

The woman moved so fast she she broke his dick. The next morning, his penis was purple. And swollen.

The couple rushed to the hosptial, where a doctor found that the man’s Corpora cavernosa had ruptured. Following a quick operation, the doctor said that the man would suffer no permanent damage.

But the stereotype lives on. WOMEN, am I right?

[Via Death and Taxes]

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