“What an asshole…” I mumble as I look down at my iPhone screen squinting through heavy mascara and dim bar lighting. I roll my eyes as I flip through the late-night conversation with the current douchebag I’m sleeping with, knowing very well that my rolling eyes won’t prevent me from finding my way to his bed tonight. It’s 2:30am and the sweet guy buying me drinks is touching my back, never below the waistline, and asking about my family. But my mind’s already in between the sheets with the aforementioned douchebag.
Why do girls always write-off the nice guys and fall for those self-absorbed assholes with bad-boy attitudes and mile-long agendas?
Well let’s dive into why these guys can be categorized as bad boys, douchebags, assholes, etc. For starters, he’s probably pretty attractive and with handsomeness comes vanity. He’s usually that guy that’s oozing confidence and for lack of better words, “swag” as he convinces everyone at the bar to do a round of shots. But maybe there’s one physical imperfection that he’s self-conscious about so he develops a complex. It’s likely that he then aggressively compensates this insecurity with either money or humor and if we’re lucky, both.
Now let’s break down why this bad boy can borrow, steal and break hearts.
As with any species, we’re initially drawn to someone by his or her physical appearance. Bad boys being the handsome devils they are, can typically bag any girl that they want so then the game is on. Not only do girls want what other girls want but they also love a good challenge. Then the reward is not only the bad boy himself but also the satisfying feeling of beating out those other broads.
His confidence plays another huge role in why he’s the object of every girl’s attention. He can take command of a room with his stupid dance moves or his hilarious story telling and people are always waiting for his next move. That leadership is what gets the attention of every female in the room because we’ve been conditioned since grade school into believing we always need to be on top, which he clearly is.
He’s also developed himself a pretty lucrative career, which means financial stability and bitches love financial stability. If you asked most girls in their early twenties what they wanted out of life, it wouldn’t be “true love” it would be to “become a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills.” We like the thought of expensive dinners and little blue boxes on our pillows. Even if we do know that’s a wildly outlandish dream when it comes to dealing with this token bad boy.
But alas, that’s what we’re ultimately hoping; to be the girl he changes for. We want to validate our own vanity and self-worth with his willingness to become a different man for us. Because eventually the games get old and we don’t want that guy who doesn’t text us until 2 a.m. looking for a late-night romp, we want the guy who will stay in on a Friday to rub our feet and watch sitcom re-runs with us.
The logical thing would be to skip the bad boy routine and go for the nice guy who doesn’t need to change because he’s already DVR’d Modern Family and has the massage oil ready for us. But what’s the fun in that? And when have women ever been logical?
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