This is two wedding posts for me in one day. Really knocking that monthly wedding post goal of ZERO out of the fucking park. It's good to overachieve, you guys!
And while I would find something like this to be hysterical if it happened at my wedding, I think my future father-in-law would commission a certain genitalia-less man to cut off my best man's dick and balls and fling them down a garbage disposal for good measure if he talked about the shit marks in my underwear. Shockingly, some people don't skid mark humor.