Today, the UN unanimously approved a new series of sanctions against North Korea, after the militant country threatened to launch pre-emptive nuclear strikes on the United States and South Korea. The serious threat has come as a shock to the international community. Why? Because Dennis Rodman said he had solved this.
As a recap: Just two weeks ago the Worm hung out with Kim Jong-un, ate dinner with him, shot the shit with him, watched, uh, Mickey Mouse perform with him. Rodman came back and, yeah, he was criticized a bit. Some were a little peeved that he called a notorious murderer "awesome." Others were hesitant to believe the word of a notorious drunk, who made a career as the first shock jock in NBA history. Even his best friends in the world—Manhattan bartenders—weren't pleased with his North Korean views: "Dennis Rodman, just back from visiting Kim Jong Un, was escorted out of the Time Hotel in Midtown on Sunday after spending hours at the restaurant bar loudly telling anyone who would listen what a great guy the North Korean dictator is. Says a witness: 'Dennis was making a total jerk of himself. He wouldn’t leave, and he wouldn’t let anyone talk to him about shutting up, or what an oppressive country North Korea is. Eventually he had to leave the bar because the bartender was starting to get [bleep]ed-off.'"
But damnit, Rodman said HE HAD IT ALL FIGURED OUT. How could he be wrong? Why is North Korea making nuclear threats? Is it possible that the former Mr. Carmen Electra didn't actually get through to a dictator?
He's not letting it get him down, though. Like the modern-day Henry Kissinger that he is, Rodman's not giving up on his quest to bring North Korea and the United States closer together. He's heading back to the forbidden country, because a diplomat's work is never done.
Rodman's publicist tells TMZ, for all The Worm's life accomplishments -- the Basketball Hall of Fame, rebounding records, defensive player awards -- the NBA legend says securing peace between Kim Jong-un and Barack Obama would be his greatest honor. Ya think?
The rep says Rodman wants to use his newly-minted friendship with Kim Jong-un to set the stage for a peace deal, convincing the dictator to engage in talks with Obama. He plans to return to North Korea in the next 6 months to host another kids basketball clinic.
And when he goes back -- Rodman will be a LOT more careful about calling Kim Jong-il and Kim Il-sung "great leaders" ... in fact, he wants to apologize for making the comment in the first place.
Rodman will probably not succeed in brokering a peace treaty. But Interpol agent Simon, Rodman's altar ego?
That guy could solve anything.