Twitter Is Taking A Fat Steamy Dump On Ciara For Ruining Russell Wilson And The Seahawks

It’s no secret that Russell Wilson and Ciara have chosen to practice abstinence – don’t know what abstinence is? Wow way to not pay attention in sex ed, aka the only class anyone INTENTIONALLY tunes into during middle / high school. Here’s some Google for you:

Laaaaaaame, but if they wanna be a sack of limp dicks (limp because he’s not erect because they’re not boning, get it? Get it??) that’s their prerogative…except Twitter ain’t havin’ it. Now that the Seahawks are official 0-2 people are looking for reasons why they’re blowing chunks. If you were to go and consult Twitter, the masses would tell you it’s because Russell Wilson is dating Ciara:

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Woof. I hope the Seahawks get their shit together, for Ciara’s sake.