Being able to say the right thing in bed is a girl’s second favorite thing for you to do with your tongue. Good sex is made up of a lot of different components. Even if you hit the gym every weekday, have incredible technique and resemble a mix of Ryan Gosling and a Greek god, your mouth can still sour the experience. Ok, well if you’re all of the above it’s still going to be a solid ride but I digress. To ensure that you don’t put your foot in your mouth and she puts another of your appendages into hers, keep reading.
If you’re the strong, silent type that’s cool but lying there in dead silence is really disconcerting. If you don’t make any sound, she will be self-conscious about breaking the silence. She also will have no clue if you’re enjoying yourself or counting the minutes until it’s over. I’m not telling you to narrate the whole time or moan loudly. (Do guys moan? Grunt? I’m going to go with grunt). Or grunt loudly. When something feels good, make it known. Low grunts, cussing or making declarations to God will work. Even telling her “that feels so *expletive* good” is direct and helpful. This also benefits you in the long run because she will make a mental note of what you vocalized as being good and do it again in the future.
Some girls like it some girls don’t. Most of us do. Start slow with cussing and questioning if she likes when you do this etc. Base your dirty talk off of her responses. If she blushes and answers with a simple yes, keep it to a minimum. If she responds with something outrageously hot, that’s your green light to get aggressive. I’d give you examples of what to say but then this post would have to be censored. I trust your imagination and libido will work together and do a sufficient job.
Say Her Name, Bitch
Take a cue from Michelle in American Pie and say her name. The heavy breathing, grunting, cussing and dirty talk is awesome but to seal the deal, whisper her name. This girl knows that this is not your first time at the rodeo. She knows that you’ve slept with many, many girls before her. By saying her name while she’s doing something that feels awesome, you are reassuring her that you not only enjoy what’s going on but you enjoy it with her. It’s like personalizing your dirty talk and it will not go unnoticed.
Give and Ask for Directions
I know men are fully incapable of asking for directions but please try. I do not doubt your capability for a minute and I’m sure even without her input you could get her off but sometimes it’s hot to be asked what we want. It’s also hot when you say exactly what you want. Instead of playing mind reader, have her tell you where she wants you and how. Hearing her say it out loud is going to be crazy hot.
Encouragement for the Big O
O-faces aren’t especially pretty. Our eye brows furrow, we grit out teeth and open our mouths super wide accompanied by some loud moaning. Hearing you say that you like seeing and hearing that happen makes us feel more relaxed and more willing to let go. Coax her toward orgasm by telling her how badly you want to make her come. The hottest thing ever said to me was “No one’s home baby, give it to me. I want to hear you scream.” Didn’t have to tell me twice.
5 Things She Does Not Want to Hear
2. Baby Talk
3. Your Ex’s Name
4. “Are Those Real?”
5. A fart... (Editor's Note: So it's cool if you queef the alphabet but we can't let out a little post-orgasm gas?)