Note from Waffles: This was sent in to us from a friend of ours at Boston College who also happens to run his own blog, College Keg Stand. This is a pretty good example of what this year's College Chicks Breakdowns should look like. Simply put, we want you to list the 10 best (or worst) things about the girls at your school. Please only email me if you intend on actually doing this because I cannot visit every school, nor can I write these things without your help. If you email me saying "Do [enter school name here], the girls here are hot and they are all huge sl*ts," I will ignore it. I need substance, Bros, not suggestions. Now let's get talking about the sexy eagles at Boston College.
10. Absurd Overuse of Spandex
No physical activity is undertaken without some combination of volleyball-spandex shorts, So Lows, or neon workout bras. These are usually accompanied by sexy tube socks, which proportionally cover the most skin on the body.
9. They Never Use Their Meal Plans
This not only keeps them slender but it also lets me commandeer their dining cards and eat absurd amounts of food on their father’s tab.
8. They Find a Way to Make J. Crew Slutty
Who knew J. Crew spelled cleavage backwards? So much for the country-club look. Apparently if the clothes are expensive it negates the fact that they squeeze the body together like a tube of toothpaste.
7. Have You Been to Boston University?
That’s what I thought. (Waffles Note: I think he is trying to knock the broads at BU down a few pegs, but I can't be certain. Perhaps he is saying that their close proximity allows you to feast on their oinkers as well?)
6. The Campus is all Steps.
Even if the chicks put on the freshman 15, they'll come out looking like Christie Brinkley from the Chuck Norris Total Gym commercials.
5. They Love Dance Parties.
Two shots of Jager and suddenly she’s grinding on you like Tony Hawk at a skate park. It's a thing of beauty.
4. They're Smart.
They’re hot enough to get with and smart enough to help you with your calculus homework after.
3. A Myriad of Blondes
You will never see so many hot blondes in one place at the same time. Some refer to it as the synod of the blondes.
2. What They Drink
Because $13 handles of Rubinoff are cheaper and more readily available than beer, girls tend to be cheap dates.
1. Their Moms are Hot
Because most of their fathers were rich enough to marry smoking hot wives, move-in day is a great time to kick back, crack a beer, and watch the MILFS roll in.
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