If you told me I could have sex with the entire Dallas Cowboys’ cheerleading squad if I solved a Rubik’s Cube within seven days, I’d end up having to settle with jerking off to their 2014 swimsuit calendar when the clock hits 0:00. It doesn’t matter if I just guzzled my entire adderall prescription, my brain simply doesn’t work like that. Way too many moving parts for the few brain cells I have left. This teenager just did in 5.25 seconds what would take me a lifetime. Whatever, I bet I would annhilate this dude in the fewest seconds to bust a nut during sex. COME AT ME, BRO!