I’m going to be straight-up with you guys because I’m an honest, albeit bitchy person: I have no idea what happened here. I read through this and I GET what happened because it’s not like I have the reading comprehension of a toaster, but I don’t understand the HOW. How did 5-year-old Jack Collins almost get his dick ripped off by the lining of his swim trunks? How did he dick get stuck in the liner in the first place? Mysteries mysteries mysterious mysteries. It all started when Jack let out “the most gut-wrenching scream” his mother, Laura, had ever heard while the two were at the pool one day:
Laura Collins was horrified when she tried to take five-year-old Jack’s swimming shorts off and the netting became caught around the end of his penis.
She said: “He let out the most gut-wrenching scream I’ve ever heard; it’s a sound no mother should ever hear.”
She says: “I knew it was caught in some way but I couldn’t figure it out and he was very distressed.
“I carried him to reception and asked for some scissors.
“When I explained what had happened they said I needed to get him straight to a doctor.”
…“The netting had became caught around the end of his willy and it was strangulating it.
“There were two little bubbles either side, like skin, like it was going to burst.(via)
Doctors were eventually able to cut Jack free, and after Jack showed that he was able to urinate and that his urinary tract had not received any lasting damage the two were allowed to go home. Speaking to Mirror, Laura stated that when she compared the holes in the netting of the Swimsuit of Death to other swim trunks there was “…only a small difference but there is a difference.” What that difference is I can’t say because LAURA didn’t say. Gee thanks Laura, I’m off to go get my dick ripped of in a pair of trunks now thanks to you. Way to save my willy.
Laura has since spoken to the manufacturer of the swim trunks and the company (Tesco, like Costco for British people) has promised an investigation.
[H/T Mirror]