Here are your Morning Headlines:
- Awesome: Dennis Rodman will have his jersey retired and dangled from the rafters...of a strip club [Guyism]
- Sports: Tony Romo qualifies for the U.S Open like he quarterbacks NFL playoff games: without much success. Fires a blistering 81. [ESPN]
- NFL Lockout: Reggie Bush declares that he is enjoying the lockout. Considers it a vacation. I hope he pulls a Shawn Kemp and gains 100 lbs. [NBC]
- Hollywood: Arnold drops Maria Shriver after 25 years of marriage. She must not give him that feeling of "c*mming." [ABC]
- Food: The Triple-Double Oreo is set to launch. It's like the Magic Johnson of cookies. It can cure HIV. [Ad Week]
- NYC: MTA looking to replace Metrocards. No plans on replacing the presence of stank-ass homeless people. [Huff Post]
- Texas: The state is very close to allowing concealed handgun license holders to carry weapons into public college buildings and classrooms. In related news, next year SMU will win a football game...in a manner eerily reflective of the first scene from the "Last Boy Scout." [Huff Post]
- Tragic: Remembering Seve Ballesteros, a man who could knock it close from the hospitality tent, parking lot, and just about anywhere else. Including a garbage can. [NY Times]
- Business: Gilt Group raises 138 million and adds itself to the list of companies I wish I founded. [NY Post]
- Funny or Die: New white iPhone 4 doesn't work so well with their all-white commercial back-drops. Video is below.
New White iPhone 4 Commercial - watch more funny videos
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