Someone Ripped An Apocalyptic Fart During A Trial That Evacuated An Entire Courtroom–Respect.

Someone ripped such a cataclysmic fart yesterday during a trial in Britain that the whole fucking room had to evacuate.

41-year-old David John Dennett was found guilty of assault while on probation for carrying an axe into a pub. Completely irrelevant information.

But as the judge was announcing that Dennett would be jailed for 14 weeks, someone ripped such an aggressive fart that the whole courtroom burst out in laughter and had to be evacuated from the courtroom.

Nick Frame, who was in the courtroom reporting for the Mansfield and Ashfield Chad said:

“The judge handed down the sentence and then paused to let it sink in. And in that silence, someone farted. We tried to stay composed but eventually everyone started laughing. It was like the back of a classroom.”

Farting is timeless. I don’t care what age you are, if you hear a crisp, audible fart in any situation and you don’t cackle, we can never be friends. I have very low standards for my friends but a requirement is when someone lets out butt burp, I expect us all to be on the same page. I don’t think thats asking too much.

I hope someday I get to meet the man who united a People with his poop particles. A true leader.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.