“Wow, you’re super pretty, wanna go on a date sometime?” can usually be a really effective opener; it’s straightforward, non-predatory and complimentary without calling the girl “hot,” which can sound aggressive or “cute,” which is how you describe infants and puppies. Here, however, that maneuver doesn’t work. There’s just a bevy of other shit going on, what with all the acres and acres of land burning around them and this TV reporter having to do her job. Plus, when someone asks you what you think about a wildfire that could very well burn everything around you to the ground answering, “It’s pretty cool” might put the nail in the we’re-never-going-on-a-fucking-date coffin.
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