This Was Just A Good Ol’ Fashioned Schoolyard Fight, Until One Dude Gets Walloped In The Face By A Flying Razor Scooter


I’m tempted to say that the using a razor scooter as a bullet breaks the unwritten rules of schoolyard fights, but so does cracking a dude in the face who’s on a cell phone. Once one rule is broken, there are no rules (Schoolyard Combat Handbook: Vol. 1, pg. 8) .

And typically, having a razor scooter is the reason a kid receives an ass whooping. Bullies, man, relentless. So its nice to see a scooter fighting back and delivering the hurt for once. Maybe shattering the dudes face was a little excessive, but the scooter probably has a lot of pent up anger.

But gotta hand it to the dude in the red. Before he got his jaw broken by a flying scooter, he pulled a pretty boss move: holding his opponent down with one hand and fending off a looming threat with another. This isn’t this dudes first schoolyard fight. But it’s probably his last.

I’m pretty confident I could kick any persons ass in this fight with the exception of one.

I’d fake an injury before going toe-to-toe with that chick.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.