I rarely wish I could go back in time, but seeing this example of roommate shaming makes me wish I lived with my old roommates again. I loved those guys, they’re some of my best friends (this is me softening the blow of all the shit I’m about to say) but HOLY FUCK did they deserve to be shamed on the Internet like this guy above. Absolute fucking slobs, the whole lot of them. Well, that’s not fair. They did clean their rooms, but they treated the common space like it would magically clean itself and it made me BOIL.
God. If I could only go back in time and do this to them…my signs would say stuff like this.
“My unkempt pubes constantly fall out and I leave them all over the toilet bowl.”
“I left all my dishes in the sink tonight, because no one besides me matters.”
“I trimmed my body hair and only thought to sweep up 80% of it.”
“I’ve never taken out the trash in five years.”
“I ate Jason’s food. I should commit suicide.”
“My girlfriend is an insufferable cunt and I’m too dumb to realize it.”
You know, playful stuff like that.