Editor’s Note: This is the latest article by our new resident hot chick, That’s What She Said. To ask her your burning questions about sex, relationships, or any other topic, just click here or the Ask a Babe logo.
Q. How do you ask a good friend to hook up with no strings attached?
A. So let me get this straight: You’re good friends with her, which means you like spending time with her; and you want to hook up with her, which means you’re attracted to her. And yet you’re looking for a no-strings-attached kind of situation. In a girl’s mind, that doesn’t quite add up.
But, O.K., I realize Bros have the itch to bang lots of chicks, and being tied down certainly hinders that. So, if you’re willing to risk your friendship for a no-strings-attached one-time hook up, just be direct and honest. Tell her you’re wondering how good she looks nekked but that you’re not interested in changing the nature of your relationship — tomorrow morning you’ll still just want to be friends. If you guys are already close, it probably won’t be a surprise to her.If she rejects the offer at first, don’t try to force it or get pissed at her. You’ve planted the seed in her mind and she might come around to the idea sooner than you think. If she does go for it, just realize that, just like in the movies, even one hook-up will change everything. Don’t be surprised if eventually one or both of you want to push things beyond “f*ckbuddy” status.
Q. A girl said she would blow me but wouldn't swallow... so where do I c*m?
A. I mean, really? Is this seriously something you can’t figure out on your own?! She’s clearly asking for you to c*m on her face and rub it in her hair. As Waffles told you last week, chicks love that.
If I must dignify this with a serious answer, you have two options that will minimize awkward logistics. One, have a cup of some kind handy, warn her that you’re about to c*m, and then let her spit it in the cup (be a gentleman: don’t stare but don’t look away in disgust either, just make yourself interested in something else briefly). Be sure to dispose of the cup. The second option would require you to be horizontal: just tell her you’re about to c*m and let it rip on your stomach. It’s not ideal, for you I guess, but if you time it right she will have basically just removed her mouth at the perfect moment. If all else fails, you have a hand. Use it.
Q. Is it cool to college girls if a guy at the party doesn't drink or smoke?
A. I think this is all how you play it off and how comfortable you are being around other people who are drinking and smoking up. If you’re down with hanging at rowdy parties and can chill and hold your own while everyone else drinks away their social awkwardness, inhibitions, and self respect, then more power to you, Bro. Your chick will never have to worry about whiskey dick, you vomiting on her, or you “accidentally” getting into bed with her roommate. All definite pluses.
The only thing I would caution against is pulling some holier-than-thou judgments while dead sober in the middle of a college rage scene. That would probably be off-putting. For some people, the best parts of college are being able to get f*cked up and act irresponsibly in a relatively consequence-free environment. If the chick you’re trying to slay wants to participate in this, that’s her choice and just like she should respect yours to abstain, you can’t get all bossy and judgy when she leads Jager bomb races, gets nekked run on the Beirut table, or dominates the funnel. (On the bright side, she’ll probably be extra frisky once you finally get her home.)
As for smoking, I’m not sure if you’re referring to cigarettes or weed, but I’m going to assume the latter since cigarettes are gross. I think the same rules as above apply about weed. As long as you can hang and not let it bother you that she’s taking bong rips, then it shouldn’t be a problem.