Life
by J. Camm on June 24, 2014

President-Obama-sneeze-guard

At restaurants like Chipotle and Subway, the sneeze guard is the line in the sand. The first and only line of defense against gross people and my fucking food. Everyone knows that you don’t cross that line. Well, everyone except a homeless guy who just scraped together $5 to buy a burrito and our Commander and Chief. Look at Barack Obama, lunging over the goddamn guard, potentially contaminating the food for the patrons behind him during his visit to Chipotle yesterday. The look on the lady’s face serving him says it all, “Is this motherfucker really breaching the sneeze guard? I just saw him shake 75 different hands.”

You just don’t do that, Barry. You don’t stretch your hands over the glass barrier. I don’t care if the employee sucks at English and can’t understand that you’re asking for salsa and not the sour cream. You figure it out. You figure it out with words, like the rest of us.

[Image via Pete Souza]

J. Camm

About J. Camm...

J. Camm is the Managing Editor of BroBible. He is a graduate of the University of Miami thanks mostly in part to a world-class short-term memory. When not writing drivel on the Internet, J.Camm enjoys golf and the inexplicable satisfaction that comes with forgetting a person's name the exact instant he meets them.