“My mum told me that if I didn’t want to get pregnant, I should put a potato up there, and I believed her,” a 22-year-old Columbian woman suffering from stomach pains told shocked doctors.
The spud had been stuck up her vagina for TWO WEEKS after her mother told her it was a good form of contraception. If she’s dumb enough to believe that she’s probably dumb enough to get pregnant but let’s focus on the craziest part of this tale — the potato’s plan to stay.
“After leaving the potato in place for two weeks, the patient began to experience intense pain in her lower abdomen. The potato had germinated and grown roots inside her, the website said. “
The potato was looking to move in for good. Can you blame it? It’s warm, cozy, rent free, the landlord is an idiot and not dicks are going to move in next door.