Pizza Pouch Necklace IS AN ABSOLUTE GAMECHANGER

Never, ever go without a piping hot slice of pizza again with this Pizza Pouch necklace.

No one should ever be without pizza. Sadly, (often tragically) pizza is not always available for immediate hand-to-mouth consumption. Prepare yourself. Keep and carry a backup slice with this specially designed Pizza Pouch. A durable zip-lock sealing neck-strap pie slice device. Always fresh and ready. BONUS: Just wearing this Pizza Pouch will instantly make you more popular and attractive. It’s a bold (and delicious) fashion statement. Portable pizza. The best invention since delivery.

Will wearing a slice of pizza around your neck make you more popular? Absolutely. More attractive? Hard to tell. If you’re ugly as shit, no pizza is going to make up for that fact. Like if people can’t tell the difference between a slice of pizza and your face, this necklace is of no use for social skills.

Just look at the guy in the photo. He’s not getting laid any time soon, slice or no slice.

[via Geekologie]

Chris Illuminati avatar
Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.