Life
by Brandon Cohen on June 9, 2014

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Parents of students from Pine Valley Middle School in California are all pissed off because their kids had a sex-education class, but in addition to including all the normal stuff, like how you shouldn’t put Purell on your dick because it burns like whoa, it also had a bunch of slides featuring some questionable memes.

One slide had a picture of a woman standing on a guy’s back with the caption, “Women on top can still get pregnant.” Oh, the horror. Another slide, which talked about douching, included this picture:

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Everyone needs to just chill out. Do these parents realize that the internet exists and these kids probably see way worse shit during a typical lunch break than anything they would see in a school-sanctioned sex-ed program? In fact, I can’t believe that given the existence of the internet, there’s even a need for sex ed class. Kids these days have probably jacked their little peckers to more porn by five-years-old than I’ve seen in my entire life. If I were a principal, my sex ed program would be writing “Google.com” on the whiteboard and then telling the kids, “go home and go nuts.”

I do admit, “A Real Man Loves His Woman Every Day Of The Month” accompanied by a pic of Bear Grylls with a bloody mouth is pretty hilariously disgusting and weird to show a bunch of kids. What exactly were they trying to “educate” the kids about there? Was this class taught by Kenny Powers?

This story is made even funnier once you get a load of the woman who runs the organization who put together the presentation.

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Judi Shaplin knows what the kids want, and she doesn’t give a shit if she ruffles some lame-ass parents’ feathers in the process. I picture her storming into the boardroom, slamming down her binder, and yelling, “MEMES! That’s what the kids want, you fucking dopes! Get out there and get me memes we can insert into the presentation or you’re all fired!” Judi is a tough SOB, but you gotta respect her for knowing what she wants. Keep doing you, Judi.

Brandon Cohen

About Brandon Cohen...

Brandon Cohen was raised by Jew gypsies on the sleepy island of Manhattan, and went on to defy the odds by graduating from a four-year accredited university in Nashville, TN. He's a writer and aspiring street fight videographer. Back in 2008, Brandon talked to Amanda Bynes at a club in LA for over fifteen minutes.