Getty Image
It’s such a trite cliche that parents don’t have favorite children. You know it — for a fact, in fact — because just look at yourself. Your mom can barely look at you when you come home for Thanksgiving. She isn’t even excited you made the trip. Now your sisters, the ones who work for the NGO and the big management firm, those are some good children. Your mom loves them.
You, not so much.
Take solace! It’s not just a human emotion to be repulsed by one of your babies. It’s a reaction that occurs throughout the animal world. Case in point, Mei Xiang, the asshole panda at the National Zoo, who just gave birth to twins. She’s already neglecting one of the two. This kid hasn’t even yet dabbled in drugs, swiped a $20 from her purse, or forgot to mail her a card on her birthday, and already, she’s like, “Fuck off, shit child of mine.”
What a fucking b.
From Time:
Mei Xiang, the female giant panda at Washington’s National Zoo, has been devoting her maternal attention to the larger of the twin cubs she gave birth to over the weekend, jeopardizing the health of the smaller cub.
Since Monday afternoon, the 17-year-old bear has dismissed zookeepers’ attempts to switch the two cubs for nursing.
At least your mom fed you. This panda doesn’t even fuck with doing that for her own flesh and blood. Cold.