There’s No Part Of This Story About A Burglar Living Under A Guy’s Bed For Three Days That Isn’t Insane

Did you ever get the feeling someone else was in your house? There might be and he might be under the bed, for like, three days.

INCIDENT / CRIME: Burglary, Criminal Trespass, Theft of Service

On 05/10/2015 at 1847 hours, police responded to a 911 call on Ellenel Blvd for a report of an intruder in the house.

Upon arrival, officers came in contact with Jason Hubbard who was inside the house on Ellenel Blvd. Police subsequently placed Hubbard under arrest for Criminal Trespass.

Further investigation revealed that Hubbard entered the home through an open door, three days prior, when the homeowner was taking out the garbage. After entering the house, he proceeded into a spare bedroom where he stayed under a bed for 3 days. He also began charging his 4 cell phones utilizing an electric outlet under the bed.

Hubbard remained living under the bed in the spare bedroom until the homeowner heard a noise in the bedroom. When the homeowner looked under the bed, he found Hubbard and immediately called police.

At the conclusion of the investigation, Hubbard was also charged with Burglary and Theft of Services (electric current). He was transported to Spotswood Police Headquarters where he was processed as per departmental policy. He was then transported to Middlesex County Adult Corrections Center in lieu of $50,000.00 bail.

INVESTIGATING OFFICER: Ptl. Nelson Nichols

Let’s go over the insanity in bullet points:

  • He snuck in while the dude was taking out his garbage. That’s, at the most, a half a minute task. That’s ninja-like quickness.
  • The burglar gets into the house, runs into the spare bedroom, and starts charging HIS FOUR CELL PHONES. Four. Four cell phones.
  • He remained “living under the bed for three days.” Did he ever come out from under the bed? He didn’t stay there even when the guy was at work, right? He had to have left the room, or the house, at least once right? He had to get out to piss or shit.
  • How nice is this bedroom that this guy stayed for three days! Is there amazing cell service? Is he homeless AND unaware of any other electrical outlets in the world?
  • The burglar was only charged with “theft of services.” He didn’t steal ANYTHING else? Nothing? Just a charge? He stole a charge?

I don’t know the homeowner but I feel like if this burglar just rang the bell and said “can I charge my phones? ” he would have let him. He might have even offered him the spare bed. “Cool, mind if I sleep under it?”

[Spotswood PD via Facebook]

Chris Illuminati avatar
Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.