If You’re Jewish And Want A Girlfriend, This Sorority Girl On Craigslist Is Looking For You

Last month we brought you the NYC girls who were looking for post-grad fratstar boyfriends on Craigslist, but that’s old news. Why? Because NOW we have another NYC girl who are looking for post-grad fratstar boyfriend…who’s Jewish. Surprise twist right there.

While I can’t definitively say that this Craigslist ad is an intentional spoof / attempt to capitalize on the last seeking-boyfriends post, what I can say is that, after my 3 years at UMD where a huge portion of the undergrads are Jewish, this is painfully accurate of a large portion of 20-something Jewish girls.

Needed: Jewish Fall BoyfriendSeeking nice Jewish boy for the fall

AEPhi alum, Murray Hill dwelling Jewish PR girl looking for a Jewish fall boyfriend to share apples and honey with and complain about being hungry while fasting to with food and angry face emojis and then later complain to that there is no bagel emoji when the fast is finally broken

The High Holy Days are upon us and it’s time to open your eyes to temple cuties before all the eligible Jewish ladies begin to cover their bodies with black tights, black booties and lots of black leather. The weekends of the t-bounce at Finale are coming to a close
Needed: 1 nice Jewish boy ready to stop J Swiping and settle down with a nice Jewish girl around Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippor, committed to being serious by Passover (one Sedar per family).

Interested applicants must live between 28th and 39th Street and absolutely no further west than Lex (Ideally within the Murray Hill triangle- Rivergate, Windsor Court and New York Towers. . .Cinema for breakfast, Cask for dinner and Pizza 33 for late night and you’ll think I’m cute when I finish my pizza before you and then start eating yours)

Requirements
Connected via at least seven friends from at least two of the following four categories (all four gets bonus points): high school, camp, college, law school

Age is just a number

5’10” in shoes or taller (I’m a realist), will accept 5’9.5″ but must be willing to buy me all new flats to go out in

Going out wardrobe should include: various plaid shirts, Seven Jeans and shoes without an obvious platform; Loungewear should include: Basketball shorts, old And1 t-shirts and sneaker slippers you still have from your best friend’s Bar Mitzvah

Grew up on Long Island “but in a grounded way” or in Westchester or Northern Jersey (no further south than Marlboro)

College education from Michigan, Wisconsin, Penn State, Maryland, Indiana, Syracuse;

Frat necessary (unless you were in a hilarious Jewish comedy group), AEPi or ZBT preferred.

If there was a Sigma in your frat’s name it better be followed by an Alpha Mu.

Current job in finance, law or medicine. Law and medical school accepted as long as you can prioritize me

Parents have a house in the Hamptons

Activities
Giving me your school’s shirt when we go to watch football on Saturdays at the Michigan bar (or lower tier school)

Pregaming with our friends in our Murray Hill apartments

Going out on the LES

Talking about being Jewish

Being Mr. and Mrs. Claus for Santa Con

Good Yontif (if you don’t know what that means, JSwipe left)

[H/T Elite Daily]
[Image via Shutterstock]