Is Chivalry Dead?: A Guide For Doing the Bare Minimum When Courting Chicks

 

Maybe I'm just getting old and can still here my dad droning on about asking a girl to the movies and picking her up in his mom's station wagon. And while I still gag at the thought of any guy I date ever driving a station wagon, I wonder why courting a woman can't be modernized or at least compromised.
Call me high-maintenance or old-fashioned but there are a few thing that our fathers did right.

If you want to play, you've got to pay. I went on a casual coffee date with a new guy recently and was surprised when he questioned whether he should fork over the $2.83 for my drink. I would have left right then but I really wanted my coffee. If she reaches for her purse, you should swat her hand down before you ever let her pay. We know you make more money than us; society has drilled that into our heads. So before you complain about always having to foot the bill, think about who's sitting across the table from you. Her nails are done, her hair's blown out and she’s sporting a new pair of heels, she went all out for you sir and that does not come cheap. So as you roll on some Old Spice as you're running out the door, remember that this girl has been preparing for days and “Dutch” is a nationality, not a dating style.

This brings me to my next point, compliments. We don't expect you to fawn over us or name specifics about why we look nice. But primping for an hour and a half deserves some appreciation. Only use “hot” to describe stoves and sluts and only refer to puppies and toddlers as “cute”. Here's a hot tip, say she looks gorgeous. Not only is this adjective vastly under used, it makes us feel womanly. Imagine how you feel when a girl says you're handsome, it's like that but better.

Manners gentlemen, use good manners. I'm embarrassed that I even have to touch on this but please use proper etiquette whilst out with a lady, however unladylike she may be once you get home. I once had a date that kept burping throughout and granted he did attempt to disguise and muffle these belches but maybe next time don't order the French onion soup. In a time when holding the door or pulling out a chair seems outdated, it does not go unnoticed or unappreciated when these little things are done. Take her coat, help her out of the car, offer her your arm and remember that we all think we’re Disney princesses so you should treat us accordingly.

Don't correct a lady. We don't like being wrong but we especially don't like being told that we're wrong.

So what if I can't correctly pronounce the name of a restaurant? I didn't realize speaking Cantonese was a requirement for dating.

Put down your fucking smart phone. Unless you're the CEO of a Fortune 500 company, nothing is so important that it can't wait until we've finished our meal. I have an ungodly twitter addiction and I don't even keep my phone on the table.

You can say it's shallow, but we notice things like nice shoes. If you don't care enough to take care of yourself, why would I think you care enough to take care of me? You don't need to groom your eyebrows but at least buy yourself a pair of nice loafers.

First date kisses are tricky, you want to be aggressive and let her know you're into her but you also want to respect her womanhood. I should hope that you have the capabilities to read the signs and know when the feeling is mutual but my experience tells me otherwise. If you're unsure, forgo the lip locking.
With so many different avenues to meet people these days, including dating websites and social media, courting a girl will help you stand out. Long gone are the days of going steady and asking her father's permission to date her, we get it. But does that justify the half-assed attempts being made to woo a lady?

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