You Can Now Get Laid on Instagram; Photo-Sharing Service Adds Direct Messages

It got 20 likes. But that was the end of it. None of those likes metastasized into me having sex, which is basically the entire reason I got a dog and joined Instagram (kidding). 

The reason I wasn't able to score from a photo of my dog on Instagram (unlike on Twitter), is that everything on Instagram is in a public forum. The comments section can be seen by anyone. So, if someone likes a photo of my dog, I can't concievably write “@lbellingham you should come on a walk with us some time 😉 .” Everyone would see my flirting, and the girl would be creeped out about my publicly propositioning her. 

But that is all set to change, because Instagram is adding a private messaging feature. From the New York Times' Bits Blog

The popular photo-sharing app Instagram introduced on Thursday a messaging service that would let users send private photos and videos to their friends directly. 

Why did they add it? Because everyone on Instagram is pissed they haven't been getting laid. Seriously.  

[Kevin Systrom, a founder and the chief executive of the company] said that the feature is meant to let people start a private conversation around a particular photograph or video. 

Right. We all know what he means by that. Getting down. So have at it everyone. We've all been screwing gobs of people thanks to Facebook and Twitter. It's time for Instagram users to get in on the sexy DM fun. 

[Photo of Mandy via my Instagram account, which you should follow (@DavidCovucci)]